Close Relationships

Book: Gendered Lives

Author: Julia Woods

Chapter 9: Gendered Close Relationships

Julia Woods points out some really interesting factors when it comes to relationships with one another. Throughout this chapter she focuses on the relationships between men and women, men and men, and women and women. The three types of relationships we have here all possess something different than the other. Wood discusses the importance of closeness with another and how the emotional aspect can affect how one interacts. What I find to be very interesting in this chapter is that women are very much more sentimental than men. They take things more personal and want to talk them through. Men on the other hand talk about their plans and what they will be doing without expressing their emotions in them. I believe this where men relationships and women relationships bring a distinction to one another. Since women are much more sentimental people they become much more emotional towards one another. These emotions can be expressed in several different ways and in some aspects create drama. Men on the other hand do exactly what Julie discusses in her book. Men talk about what is going on in their lives without bringing into the mix the personal or emotional aspect of things. In the end since there tends to be emotional toll on women that is what creates the drama with each other. Their emotions are pulled one way or the other and it creates physical and emotional strain on them.

Links:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WPYqRaOm1ak

This is a great clip from Mean Girls. It expresses the emotional aspect of girls and how much when emotions are involved it can creates a lot of drama. In the clip a boy calls his mom and I think that scene creates a huge distinction between men and women based on what is going on and how they react to it.

http://www.ehow.com/video_4974387_understanding-friendship-between-men-women.html

This psychologist I found very intriguing as she talked about the difference between men and women and understand how men and women interact today through communication rather than they did several years ago.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xJp2HXBJv_4

This clip comes from one of my favorite movies of all time. Here men are trying to understand what women want and how they think. One of my favorite lines is when the girl yells at him from inside her saying “ ITS BECAUSE I HAVE A VAGINA”.

Questions:

1)      Is it a good or bad thing that women are so much more attached to the emotional side of things than men are?

2)      Are the roles of men and women going to be the same as they will be in the future?

Faux-Feminism

I Can’t Believe it’s not Feminism…On the Feminists who Aren’t

Author: Julie Craig/Spring 2002

In this chapter from Bitchfest Julie discusses several women who wrote books on feminism. However, Julie states ” Their faux-feminist rhetoric makes it easy for readers to encounter “feminism” without ever encountering actual feminism views and activism.” Meaning that these several authors talked about the issues of feminism without really addressing why they believed what they did. Instead these books posed a distraction for the readers to understand what these views of the authors were really all about. One of the authors, Christine Hoff, split feminism into two seperate categories. These categories were equality feminists, and gender feminists. It becomes a huge debate over what women’s roles are in the past and how they will shape our future. Another author by the name of Pagila belived that the creativity and innovation were only masculine traits. What Pagila is actually doing here is discussing feminist topics but not actually going with a feminist way. In the end Julie advises that we take a look at ourself and see how we identify and participate in these feminist movements and what we soley believe is true.

Links

http://feministblogs.org/I thought this blog was interesting because a bunch of women post about feminist issues and discuss it with one another.

http://www.ladiesagainstfeminism.com/– This was a site that I came across all about women who are against feminism and all about what they have to say.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1021293/How-mothers-fanatical-feminist-views-tore-apart-daughter-The-Color-Purple-author.html– An article on how feminism tore a family a part

Questions:

1) Why has feminist views become such a issue in the modern world today?

2) Have these certain authors stretched what feminism really is about?

the capital world of feminism…

And Now a Word From Our Sponsors…Feminism for Sale

Author: Rita Hao/Fall 1998

Rita does a great job discussing feminism is our culture today. Advertisers have done a great job focusing on the wants of women and what draws them on. They speak to us in each our individual voice. Their goal is to make all women feel important and that is how they target through feminist qualities. Through products, tv, and music groups advertisiers have targeted woman on what they believe woman need most. Rita discusses how retail therapy can help us with our insecurities. All girls are faced with the insecurities of being too fat, too thin, hair color, skin color, clothing types and so much more. Therefore, certain companies then focus on making their slogan on what can cure those insecurities that they might have which focus their advertisments on making women feel better. Rita writes ” Capitalism makes us think in terms of me, me, me”. In the end what they are really focusing on is making money and much less on individual. She also states, ” Feminism sells, but backlash sells even better.” What Rita encourages all women to do is to understand why we are buying something when we do. Her goal is for us to understand how the product is going to “cure” us then fall into the backlashing of what the advertisment is all about. The thearpy of retail only works she says when we know why we are really buying it.

Links:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hibyAJOSW8U– The Dove commerical focuses on woman and the true beauty of what womanhood really is about and a lot less on what it takes to be a model.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NIsvor0ID_U– What I really like about this Addidas commercial is about focusing on stronger woman and becoming who they want to be.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qzz7mT2OUfs– This CoverGirl commercial will Ellen DeGeneres focuses on the inperfection of woman with wrinkles. Ellen who is a lesbian woman has become their spokesmodel that even woman who are lesbian can be part of the feminist movement of make up.

Questions:

1) In the last few years have feminist advertisments grown to be too extreme?

2) What are some specific types of advertisements that focus on feminism but end of backlashing the movement?

 

Men’s Movements

Book: Gendered Lives

Author: Julia Wood

Chapter 4: The Rhetorical Shaping of Gender: Men’s Movements in the United States

In this chapter Wood discusses the roles of men and what their main focus on is. Some men actually consider themselves feminist and others act in movements to attack women on what is socially right. Between reading chapter 3 and chapter 4 I can tell that masculinity and femininity can take on their own role depending on the individual. One boy in the book talked about how he had both a mom and a dad who worked full-time. On some nights the dad would make dinner while the mom worked and sometimes vise-versa. In these situations it is dependent on ones opportunities they are given and how they may need to intervene in both sides of gender. I am much more passive when it comes to gender roles. I usually don’t even think about it or hear much about men or women movements. However the more I think about it the more I can think at times when feminist comments are made. I believe men already have the advantage when it comes to certain things and there is no reason for them to downplay women in any area.

 

Links:

http://abcnews.go.com/Video/playerIndex?id=7714313

This is a link from the show Man Power and the controversies that men are dealing with to gain power and rights.

http://videosift.com/video/The-Gay-Rights-Movement

Here is a video clip that discusses when the Gay Rights Movement came in and joined and what the rest of the world thought of them?

http://mensrightsboard.blogspot.com/

A Men’s Right Blog

Questions:

1) Why do some people believe that there can’t be two “leaders” in a household?

2) What has been the most controversial men’s movement?

Women’s Movements

Book: Gendered Lives

Author: Julia Wood

Chapter 3

I was never really that interested in feminist movements at all. However, Chapter 3 in wood gave me for perspectives on the thoughts on feminism and all kinds of types there are. In some cases I believe that some of the feminist movements have gone a bit far. I understand woman was to stand up and depend for their social rights but in some cases these movements can make more a bigger deal. Are these movements really making that big of a difference? Wood talks about the different types of feminism from radical, lesbian, liberal, multiracial, and power feminism just to name a few. All these types of feminism movements are aimed at one type of group to make women more noticeable and have more reasonability. Overall, I  believe women should stand up for what they believe in. Everyone has the right to vote, have property, rights about laws, etc. In regards to women’s pay I believe they should all be paid the same depending on the position. However, when it comes to abortion I believe they should not have the right. That was a choice they made and I believe abortion is not the answer.

Links:

http://josephbamat.blogs.france24.com/article/2012/09/19/french-topless-women-nudity-breasts-femen-movement-femenists-ukrain-0

this article is about a feminist movement that occurred in France a couple days ago. This feminist group took it to the extreme as they marched through the streets with no tops.

http://www.bing.com/videos/watch/video/borat-clip-feminism/5w3bwzm

This is a clip where Borat from the movie “Borat” interviews a few ladies on why feminism is such a big is

http://www.aoltv.com/2011/08/10/gloria-steinem-hbo-documentary-feminsim-video/ue.

This is a documentary form where Gloria Steinem believes that feminist movements have just begun and what lies ahead for women in the future.

Questions:

1.)    Have feminist movements made a huge impact since they began in 1840?

2.)    What might these feminist movements look like in the future and what will they be fighting for next?

verbal communication

Book: Gendered Lives

Author: Julia Wood

Chapter 5: Gendered Verbal Communication

 

I believe gendered verbal communication has becoming more of an issue in our society today  more than ever. I say this because I believe that “slang” phrases focused on either a male or female have become more inappropriate than ever. What I found to be really interesting in this chapter is when Wood mentions this, “ Language also reflects social views of women as passive and men as active when engaged in sexual activity. Have you noticed when people say, “ He laid her,” “He balled her”, “He screwed her”…The male gender have used this type of language more heavily than ever and I believe it has demeaned the worth of a woman in my opinion. Wood also states, “ We continually change our language to reflect our changing understandings of ourselves and our world.” I believe through verbal gendered communication it defines our self-worth and how we ought to feel in the world that we live in based on our surroundings. Our society has their own perspectives on their own self-refection of who they are and how things should be communicated. Some ones intentions can easily come across in the wrong fashion and it can lead to something that the other isn’t understanding of.

Related Sources

1.)    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/12/05/student-9-years-old-suspended-for-sexual-harassment_n_1129683.html

This student who was 9 years old was convicted of sexual harassment by saying that his teacher was “cute”. Again, how verbal language ended up badly affecting such a young student.

2.)    http://www.helium.com/items/1953039-five-common-relationship-misunderstandings

this article discusses the main misunderstanding men and women can have through their relationships with one another.

 

3.)    public-speaking-differences-between-men-and-women-in-the-audience-humour

 

This blog focuses on the main differences of men and women when it comes to public speaking.

 

Questions

1.)    Why are women becoming more demeaning in the society today more than ever?

2.)    What are the main contributor to such demeaning language in today’s society?

nonverbal communication

Book: Gendered Lives

Author: Julia Wood

Chapter 6: Gendered Nonverbal Communication

 

Nonverbal communication can be a very powerful thing. It can communicate to another person when someone is mad, angry, and happy towards the other. I have experienced this nonverbal communication at first hand and I am sure many others have also. Wood points out different supplement verbal communication like saying “I’m fine”. My fiancé and I know both know what “I’m fine is” when we say that to one another. It usually means the exact opposite of what we are feeling. Another one is when we say “I don’t know” truly you do know, you just don’t want to say what that might be. One’s attitude is very connected to supplement communication. On the other hand with regulate interaction I can tell when someone else is not very happy with me. I can tell by their body posture if they won’t make eye contact or walk right past without an acknowledgement. These types of functions can really hurt a relationships. The way men and women communicate through these different sorts of functions can majorly effect the way the men and women gender interact and the stereotypes that are place upon them. Wood mentions in her book “ Understanding and respecting different forms of nonverbal communication require us to make an honest effort to appreciate what another say on his or her terms.” We are always going to get different vibes from one another but I believe the best thing to do is talk it out and try to understand where the other person is trying to come from. One of my favorite movies is “What Women Want” and what I think is so great about that movie is that each gender communicates in such a certain way that they would die to know what the other is thinking of them. When it comes to “liking” we can tell by ones actions if the other is interested in or not. In return we can see how the other person reacts to it. Women would love to know what men think on a daily basis. We see them as confusing and never knowing what they truly want. Where as guys don’t understand women and why they do certain things. It the end it goes both ways.

Related Sources

1.)    http://www.livestrong.com/article/172581-do-men-women-use-nonverbal-communication-differently/

this article from Livestrong focuses on the different ways men and women do communicate non-verbally.

 

2.)    http://josephekwu.wordpress.com/2011/05/18/response-what-men-dislike-about-women/

This guy talks frequently on his blog about the differences with men and women. Here he puts his focus on what men dislike about women and how he feels on the issue

3.)    http://www.menshealth.com/mhlists/things_men_want_from_women/index.php

 

This article kind of goes off of what I said about what women and men want. This article comes from Men’s Health magazine and focuses on what men truly do want from women.

Questions

 

1.)  Are nonverbal behaviors destroying the worth of one another?

2.)  What certain symbols have we associated ourselves with that have made us who we are today as an individual?